Merry ChristSmash!
by Soundwave 0107
Summary: Sidefic to SSBB One-shots: Christmas is fast approaching, and the fun is just starting! Join the Smasher's, from Meta Knight to Snake, as they engage in the seasonal activity of the Year!
1. Samus and the Snow

**Author's Notes: It's only now I realised that the SSBB One-shots never had any chapters for Christmas. So, I created this;**

**Introducing: Merry Christ-Smash! A lil' fic for some snowy fun! It won't ever grow as big as it's sister fic, SSBB One-shots, but it's got Christmas in it! That has to count for something, right? XD**

**Enjoy the first chapter, where Lucario tries to convince Samus to come and play in the snow :)**

Today, the morning was as beautiful as it could be. The sun's light, withered slightly from the dusty coating of grey clouds in the sky, sparkled neatly off frozen grass and powdery snow. Birds twittered to one another in barren trees, black wood decorated with the frozen liquid, and icicles hung everywhere in sight. The whole lake had been frozen over, and if one were to peer into the icy depths, they'd see a sliver of green captured in the ice.

But it wasn't so much the Winter Wonderland that had attracted everyone's attention. It was mainly the fact that Christmas, a holiday in the Real World, was fast approaching, and Master Hand had given the Smasher's a week off to enjoy the snow and the festive holiday.

Everyone had worked hard to decorated the titanic structure, and tinsel and wrappings hung across the ceilings, banisters and walls. Holly decorated the tables in spiky green piles, and a single plant of mistletoe watched from the kitchen doorway. Already, a group of snowmen were gathered outside the building, and a massive Christmas tree towered over all in the dining room, baubles and lights sparkling off the green pine leaves, with a dusting of snow on the botanical organism for an authentic look. Stockings and smiling reindeer plushie hung off the doors and walls, and Peach had even placed a smiling Megatron plushie wearing a Christmas hat on the sofa.

Needless to say, that Megatron plushie looked adorable.

However, one person was not happy about the thick layer of snow that surrounded the Mansion, and that person was Samus Aran.

Currently, the bounty hunter, grumbling softly to herself under her breath, was wrapped in thick winter clothes, a light-blue jumper and thick fluffy navy-blue trousers, topped with a bright yellow scarf and a blue hat, with only her eyes visible under the cranium covering, glaring at nothing in particular. The girl was wrapped further in a purple blanket snuggling deeply into the large couch of the living room, facing a merrily crackling fire in the elaborate fireplace. This room had been decorated as well as the others, but Samus didn't care, as she huddled in her bunker, clutching the Megatron plushie tightly to her (ample) chest.

Even with her thick clothing, her warm blanket and the blazing fire, the girl still felt the bitter kiss of cold on her skin. There was a good reason why Samus hated the coming of snow and ice, and the reason was simple; Due to having Metroid DNA in her body, from that battle against the X, Samus' body now held a cruel weakness to cold and ice. Even the slightest dip in temperature had the poor huntress retreating to Charizard (The Pokemon was curled up in front of the fire, currently, asleep) or Mario, or anyone else who could produce a roaring flame to keep herself warm.

True, her human body protected her from the worst of it, and cold wasn't fatal to her (Except, of course, in obvious situations like a blizzard or hypothermia) but she had an instinctive hatred of it. It was why she hated fighting the Ice Climbers, or facing Lucas' PK Freeze...

The living room door opened then, and a wind of cold blew in, stealing through the room, slipping through Samus' clothing defences, and hissing against her skin in a blistering and not-very-nice sensation that had her snapping angrily: "Shut the door! You're letting the cold in!"

Lucario raised an eyebrow, but complied and shut the door behind him. He wasn't too fond of this sweltering heat (Being a Steel-type had it's drawbacks) but he was in here for a more important quest. With that in mind, the Aura Pokemon asked Samus: _"Samus, would you like to come outside with us? Lucas and Ness were hoping you would help them build a snow-fort."_

"Tell them I can't." Samus muttered grumpily, glaring at the Fighting-type. "I don't like the snow. Matter of fact, I hate it."

Lucario raised an eyebrow again, but made to sit down next to Samus, whom shifted slightly to make room for him. The duo were silent for a moment, as Charizard sleepily scratched his yellowish belly, his tail resting in the fire, when the Fighting-Steel-type noted:

_"You know, you really should come out and get some exercise. You've been sitting in here all morning, and all of last night. Surely, you wouldn't mind bearing the snow a while, just to relax?"_

"I already told you, Lucario." Samus muttered in annoyance, not liking the interruption of her snuggling warm time. "I hate the snow. I can't stand it. It gets right to me, and not in a good way. I'm not alright with that stuff, you know?"

_"Well, I am part Steel."_ The Pokemon pointed out coolly, detecting the woman's frustration and deciding to match it with some logic. _"And with being of that metallic element, I dislike this intense heat. It causes shivers of caution and fear to slip through my fur, and up my spikes. Yet, I am still in here, sitting with you, talking to you. It is a matter of focusing on something other then your dislike. Why not spend time with Lucas or Ness? Perhaps engage in a snowball fight? There is plenty of activities outside to do, to distract you from the cold."_

"I'd rather not." Samus grunted stiffly. The idea of rolling around in that hellishly cold crap was not a pleasant idea, and she had the faint urge to whip out her Paralyser and blast the annoying Pokemon till he left her alone.

Lucario sighed: _"Well, I suppose I can't convince you." _The Pokemon stood up to go, but not before smiling ever so softly and stating: _"Such a shame. Ness and Lucas were really hoping to play with you. It will be so disappointing to them, how they were let down by their motherly figure just because she didn't like the cold that much. Such a shame indeed. Arceus above knows that a little family bonding is the best thing for a snow day."_

"Get out of here and spare me your crap." Samus muttered grumpily, childishly pulling the blanket over her head.

Lucario shrugged, before whipping away out through the door with an Extremespeed. Charizard opened an eye at the other Pokemon's passing, before letting out a content yawn and falling back into sleepy land.

The bounty hunter sighed with annoyance, as the Pokemon's words were biting into her deeper then even the faint wisps of cold. That punk was a pain in her ass, with his smarty-pants talk, and saying that Lucas and Ness would be sad without her, and she should... she should...

Ah, damn it all! She was Samus Aran, the legendary Bounty Hunter, defender of the galaxy and hero of the Galactic Federation, and the major ass-kicker of that freak, Ridley! No mere words would lead to doubt in her strong and powerful mind!

With that, the woman folded her arms across her chest stubbornly and huffed in annoyance, the little Megatron plushie squeaking as she squeezed it. Samus grumbled about stupid Mewtwo-replacements and stupid snow and stupid Snake, before she shook her head and sighed softly.

Damn it all...

**Outside**

A surge of energy, a flash of blue, and Lucas' PK Freeze exploded in a shower of white energy, the freezing powers of the cryokinetic move freezing the wall of the two psychic's snow fort, enforcing it with a shield of ice. Ness and Lucas' fort was fairly impressive, a thick square of walls, with pads of ice within to stand on and look over the guarding walls. The icy walls, formed by PK Freeze, held it upright and kept it strong, and it would of great support when Ness and Lucas had their snowball fight with Pit and Marth.

However, the young blonde sighed and gazed around the wintry land, clad in his own warm jumpers and trousers and gloves. Ness had been helping him, sure, but the youngster really wanted Samus to come out. He viewed the woman almost like a mother, since they were very relatable to one another, having both lost their families to cruel forces. He'd asked Lucario to see if Samus would come out, but somehow, Lucas doubted the bounty hunter would. She was much too mature and rather cynical for childish activities.

The boy sighed, before watching as Ness waved at him, before readying his bat, as a nearby Mario, with only a scarf, charged up a crimson fireball, and tossed it at the psychic, whom swung his bat round and smacked the ball of fire into the sky, where it exploded into a shower of heat and sparks, earning applause from a watching Yoshi, Kirby and Diddy Kong.

At least they were having fun, Lucas mused, and at least Marth, a kind of uncle to the psychic, would play with him-

_"Greetings, Lucas."_

The boy turned to see Lucario sat in a meditative pose nearby, looking very rested and powerful, Aura seeping off him in tiny flares of blue fire.

"Oh, hi Lucario." Lucas replied, feeling a slight hope that maybe Samus would come out, but not so much, seeing as the woman was nowhere in sight. "Um... is Samus coming out?"

Lucario shook his head, and Lucas sagged slightly, the boy sighing, slightly thankful for his pessimistic mind having prepared him for the disappointment, and the Pokemon said: _"I'm sorry, Lucas. But she hates the bitter cold and prefers to coddle herself and grumble. She simply does not want to come out in the snow. Perhaps when the weather warms up, she will-"_

_BASH!_

Both Lucas and Lucario yelped in shock as a large snowball soar through the air and smacked the Fighting-type right in the head. knocking him to the ground. The psychic, surprised by this attack on Lucario, turned towards the Mansion, expecting to see a laughing Snake or something, but he was shocked- And delighted- to see none other then a smirking Samus, the woman wrapped up tightly, idly tossing a second snowball in her right hand, before that too was thrown at Lucario, whom took the attack right on his rear with a yelp.

"Samus!" Lucas cried with joy, happy to see his close friend-parental figure outside with him, running over to her and flinging himself into her arms for a tight hug. Of course, the bounty hunter was stronger then her slim frame suggested, and she caught the kid with ease, laughing slightly, before setting him down and stating proudly: "Didn't think I'd make it, did you?"

Lucas rubbed his head sheepishly, grinning up at the blonde, whom smirked in reply, as Lucario got back to his feet, grumbling at the snowy attack, but smiling nonetheless at the success of his short talk, before the psychic replied: "Well, I thought you didn't like the snow..."

"True." Samus replied, shivering slightly, hating the bitter cold, but having taken Lucario's advice, she was ignoring it in favour of paying attention to Lucas. Out of mind, not so much annoying, you could say. "But hey, what's a little snow compared to my friends?"

Lucas smiled widely as Ness jumped over, and the three promptly joined Lucario and Mario into an ensuing snowball fight, snow flying everywhere.

True, Samus hated snow, hated the cold.

But like she said, what's a little dislike when you can play with your friends, eh? :)

**Author's Notes: Christmas is soon to come! I can't wait! My young teen mind is going nuts! :D (Bet you lot thought I was older, didn't you ;P)**

**Thumbs up for the Megatron plushie!**


	2. Ganon's Angels

**Author's Notes: Chapter 2 is here! It's pretty short, but sweet.**

**Time for Pit to teach the Smasher's how to make Snow-angels! :D**

Snow fluttered from the grey sky like tiny clouds of fluff, scattering across the land in a powdery blanket of solidified dihydrogen oxide, turning green fields and black mountains white with the wintry wonder. There was much excitement in the air, both for the snow and for the upcoming holiday of Christmas and the ensuing New Year.

Currently, the Mansion stood proud and tall, slathered with snow and decorated most wonderfully with the ideal Christmas decorations. Truly, it was a beautiful sight to behold as the sun gleamed gently upon the land, reflecting off the snow and white in glitters of Shining Beauty. Truly a wonderful sight.

Currently, clad in his white snow outfit, with specially cut slits in the back for his feathery wings to poke through, Pit spoke cheerily to the duo that were currently trying their best to ignore him- Wolf and Ganondorf were more content to bask in the little sunlight they had rather then hear whatever stupid crap the angelic fighter was spouting out. Neither of the two were inclined to all the excitement of joy and happiness that Christmas time brought them, and were DEFINITELY not inclined to this cheerful Smasher preaching.

A passing Kirby, however, wrapped in a scarf, did notice the angel's attempts to stir the lupine and the King of Evil, and took in what the winged wonder was saying: "C'mon, you two! Come make snow-angels! It's lot of fun!"

The idea of snow-angels was intriguing to Kirby; Was it edible?

However, Ganondorf and Wolf did not share the same curiosity as the marshmallow look-alike, and the canine voiced this as nastily as he could: "Listen, bird-brain, and listen good. We don't care about making stupid snow-angels! Just leave us alone, and let us relax, for crying out loud!"

"Hear, hear!" Ganondorf roared in response, shaking his fist at the pouting angel. "Now, go away! You're in my sun!"

However, much to Kirby's surprise, the angel did not meekly back down. Instead, the winged fighter puffed up in defiance, glaring coldly at the evil duo, his wings flaring up in anger, and Pit snarled: "Listen up, bubs. It's either have and make snow-angels with me, Pit, or I'll tell Peach who REALLY stole her cake!"

Ganondorf paled in utmost horror, and quickly jumped up from his seat in fake enthusiasm, squeaking: "Alright, let's make angels! Please, now!"

Wolf sniggered, but gulped as Pit turned on him and snapped: "And as for you, Wolf. I'm sure Meta Knight will love to know who wrote: "Overcompensating for short stature" on the Halberd! He'll make a _ point _of introducing you to Galaxia, I'm sure!"

"Tattletale." Wolf muttered as he grudgingly got to his feet, making sure to rig Pit's bed with some horrible trap later.

"Excellent." Pit stated brightly, bouncing on his feet in giddy joy. "C'mon, let's go! Plenty of good deep snow over there- Oh, hi Kirby! Wanna join us?"

Having just received the angel's attention, Kirby jerked slightly in surprise, before processing his fellow Smasher's words and deciding that making these snow-angels would be fun! So, Kirby grinned and nodded in agreement at Pit, whom smiled widely and cried: "Alright, folks, let's make some stuff in the snow!"

As he bounced off, followed by a giggling Kirby and a grumpy Wolf, Ganondorf growled to himself: "I swear to the Void itself, if I ever get the chance, unleash horrible vengeance upon that damned Palutena-pervert!..."

Pit waited patiently, Kirby jumping up and down next to him, as Wolf and Ganondorf dragged themselves over to stand before him, and the warlock grunted: "So, what do we do now, dare I ask?"

"It's simple, really, very clear, like music drifting in the air, invisible, yet everywhere!" Pit rhymed cheerfully, grinning at his comrades, before folding his wings onto his back and laying down in the snow, and he began shifting his arms and legs to and fro through the powdery solid, forming an imprint in the white land. When he deemed himself finished, the angel agilely leapt from the ground, landing on his feet next to the wolf, and he gestured to the imprint in the snow; A depth in the land shaped vaguely like an angel in a dress.

"I see." Wolf mused. "Very well. I'll go next."

The canine laid down on his back, just like Pit had done, and began shifting his arms and legs, just like Pit had done. Pretty soon, he was done as well, as he got back up to observe his work. It was a shorter angel, with wolfish ears, but it was a good snow-angel. Kirby cheered, before having a go as well, landing in the snow and shifting his chubby body around. The result was a perfect circle in the snow. Wolf and Ganondorf exchanged glances as Pit grinned at Kirby, and said: "Nice one. Very round."

"Your turn, mister King of Evil." Wolf sneered at Ganondorf, taunting the warlock. "C'mon, if we can do it, so can you!"

"Ah, so you think it's fun now, Wolf?" Pit chuckled, grinning at the canine. The lupine shrugged in response, as Ganon huffed and promptly shoved the lupine out of his way, before getting down on his back and repeating what the others had done. Grumbling to himself, the King of Snow-angels finished his work and got back up, and the others moved in to see how he had done-

Only for Pit, Kirby and Wolf to jump back in utter horror, shock on their faces as they retched with disgust in face of the abominable sight on the snow. Somehow, Ganon's evil had imprinted itself on the snow in a horrifying, disturbing, terrifying, unholy, satanic image that tore the mind asunder and burnt the soul in its abominable evil and cruelty, so cruel in fact, that the Author himself suffered horror to his soul. Pit literally threw up all over the ground as Kirby fled, screaming in horror, and Wolf looked as though he had seen the Devil himself.

Ganondorf merely grinned as Wolf dragged Pit away from the terrible image, as a passing Fox promptly got disturbed by what he saw in the snow and fainted. Note to self:

Vengeance achieved.

**Author's Notes: Ganondorf inflicts the worst of the worst upon Pit. How delightfully evil.**

**Well, the gang made snow-angels. How fun XD**

**For those who are curious as to that the imprint in the snow was, take the worst thing you could ever imagine, something that would burn your entire being to the ground in unholy horror, then times it by a million, then think of something even worse...**


	3. List of the Fifth

**Author's Notes: Albeit, not too Christmas related this chapter, I just could NOT resist doing this about the Fifth Generation for Pokemon! X3 If you don't know**

**Enjoy!**

**Oh, and I forgot to mention: Last chapter had a sneaky reference to the Fifth Gen. Whomever discovers it, or at least gets pretty close to it, gets a free request! :D Your only clue, other then it's from Pokemon, is that it's somewhere in the first four paragraphs.**

**But enjoy this chapter first :)**

Though most of the action that beautiful morning was outside in the sparkling snow, from Mario and Fox having a snowball fight, to Bowser building a snowman, to Zelda shoving snow down Ike's shirt, much to his unhappiness, sometimes, a Smasher would remain inside, in the colourful warmth of the Mansion's interior. One such Smasher was Falco Lombardi, ace pilot of the Star-Fox Team and the coolest bird you could ever meet.

Currently, the blue falcon was sat before his beloved computer, a marvellous piece of technology, that could anything another computer could do, but faster and better. It downloaded stuff faster, played games better and what not. Falco adored it like it were his own child. The bird's room was nice and warm, with a shiny metallic feel about it, decorated with computer monitors and radar (When you spent most of your days on the Great Fox, artificial surroundings grew homier to you) and Christmas lights and tinsel.

Anyway, Falco had come across an interesting website, one that had such an interesting theme, that he was literally laughing his head off, clutching his stomach as his diaphragm protested the amount of laughing. And this laughing attracted the attention of a passing Captain Falcon, whom poked his head in through the door and asked: "Hey, Falco, what ya' laughing at?"

"Come and look, my fellow falcon!" The avian sniggered, to which the racer shrugged at and walked in, standing next to the bird as Falco gestured to what the monitor was displaying. It was a bright yellow page, with a title: "Facts about Kamitsure."

And underneath it, was a large box, with a small arrow pointing 'right' under it, stating 'Next'. And in the large box, were these words:

_Before he goes to bed every night, Giratina checks his closet to make sure Kamitsure isn't in there_

Captain Falcon read it with surprise, before the humour of the Pokemon equivalent to the Grim Reaper ever checking his closet for that Electric-type Gym Leader hit him, and the racer burst into a roar of laughter, as Falco joined in as well, the two bird-named Smasher's roaring with laughter at the utter funniness of what they just read.

"Holy crap! Where did you find this?" Captain Falcon sniggered, reigning in his laughter to pose the question.

"Dunno, just did!" Falco sniggered in reply, before clicking on the 'Next' arrow to see what came up. "Now, what's next?"

The next text came up, and it had both Smasher's sniggering when the box above the arrow now said: _Flying-type Pokemon used Fly to escape Kamitsure. Not to be outdone, Kamitsure invented Thunder._

"Ha! This is awesome!" Falcon sniggered, giving Falco a high-five in their discovery of this hilarity as a passing Kind Dedede looked in and asked: "What are you two laughing at? If it's that damnable Gummy Bear again, I swear-"

"No, penguin!" Falcon stated, dragging Dedede over to stand next to the blue bird's computer, Falco chuckling as he moved slightly see that Dedede could see past him at the computer. "It's a list of facts about Kamitsure, that Gym Leader from Pokemon's Fifth Generation!"

"As if four wasn't enough..." Dedede muttered, looking at the screen. "So, what-... HA! Invented Thunder? That Electric-move that can hit people using Fly? Clever!"

"I know, right?" Falco laughed, clicking on the arrow again. "C'mon, let's see what comes on next!"

And, as the trio laughed anew, again and again, these various phrases sprang up on the computer, like this clever one: _ Kamitsure gives Darkrai nightmares. _And the list went on!:

_Ditto can transform into anything- Even Kamitsure. However, if he transformed into Kamitsure, he would die from overload of Kamitsure.  
Arceus created the World. Kamitsure created Arceus. While she was on the loo.  
Kamitsure does not recharge after Hyper Beam. She kills you again.  
Pokemon faint when they run out of HP. People die when they run into Kamitsure.  
Kamitsure poisons Steel-types, electrocutes Ground-types, earthquakes Flying-types and mind-beats the hell out of Dark-types.  
Explosion makes the user Faint. Except Kamitsure. She simply explodes you again.  
Kamitsure once kicked a dimension in the face. We now know this dimension as the Distortion World.  
The Master Ball may catch anything due to superior power, but Kamitsure's Poke-balls can catch anything as well. Because the caught Pokemon are too scared to come out.  
Kamitsure HAS caught them all. Twice.  
When Kamitsure suggestively said "Megahorn" to Fuuro, it was the only case of a Bug-type move being super effective against a Flying-type.  
Kamitsure does not sleep. She only waits for you to sleep yourself, so she may kill you without the screaming.  
If Kamitsure used Metronome, it would always be the same move: "You die now."  
Kamitsure can drown a Kyogre and overheat a Groudon.  
_  
At this stage, the trio of birds (Two falcons, one penguin) were rolling on the floor, laughing hysterically, beating the ground with their fists, choking on their own laughter and just having a fun time, as friends should do on Christmas!

However, there soon came a downside to their laughter, and that downside was this; Peach was attracted by the guffaws and hoots of humour, and entered the room to see what the commotion. Unfortunately for our three unaware laugh-a-lots, she moved over to the computer and saw what they were looking at. Now, if there was one thing Peach hated, it were stupid sites that said wacky things like the above list. And when Peach hates something, you can bet your grandmother on that she'll make it known. And she did;

"What the HELL are you three idiots looking at?" Peach shrieked with rage in face of those damned sites.Instantly, the three took notice of her and gaped in horror, before trying to cover themselves up:

"It was nothing! Just a joke! Don't kill us! Just something to kill time! Don't kill US. It's nothing, don't worry! You're just overreacting!"

Peach snarled angrily at them, earning yet even more girly whimpers of fear from the great Captain Falcon, the mighty King Dedede and the heroic Falco, hissing: "Sites like that are overrated and NOT FUNNY! How dare you ruin the tranquil fun of Christmas with such stupidity!Do you want us to get negative reviews for using the same joke, again and again? DO YOU?"

"Peach, please! Spare us! It's Christmas soon!" King Dedede begged shamelessly.

"True. Which is why I'm going to HURT you slightly less then I normally do, with this fun Christmas frying pan."

Peach promptly whipped out a gleaming silver sauce pan, decorated with smiling Santa faces, and she grinned maniacally at the horrified males, before sniggering: "So, who's first?"

They pointed at anything but themselves.

Such a shame, really, to be beaten before Christmas...

**Later**

Dr Mario was working in his office, a Santa hat on his scruffy brown hair, when the beaten forms of Dedede, Falco and Falcon were tossed, all tied together with a single red ribbon, and a note stating: _ Merry Christmas, Doctor Mario._

The good doctor smiled at his note, before shouting into the air: "I BETTER BE-A GETTING A PAY RAISE-A FOR CHRISTMAS!"

**The Distortion Realm**

The titanic form of a monstrous serpentine beast, with sharps clawed wings like tentacles, golden spikes around a grey, sleek body, like a snake, and a golden mask covered a draconic face, crimson eyes glowing in the dark void of the dreaded Distortion Realm, a world where physics and gravity are nothing against the corrupting power of the legendary Giratina.

The massive Ghost/Dragon spun through the twisted dimension with as much ease as a shark glides in the sea, a monster in his turf, an unstoppable creature.

However, the Legend was for a more important mission today. Slowly, the beast approached an idling island which held a black wardrobe on it, part of a ritual he engaged in every night. Nervously, the Ghost/Dragon approached the wooden compliment to this dimension, cautious and wary. Gently, a tentacle-like claw reached for the handle, and slowly, slowly, Giratina opened the door-

And his crimson eyes widened in ultimate horror, as a feminine voice hissed: "Yep. I'm in here today. Want a five-second head-start?"

Giratina had a single thought before fleeing as fast as he could: _"All I want this Christmas is survival."_

**Author's Notes: A random chapter, I know, but hey, I liked it :)**

**Only around five-four days till Christmas! I CAN'T WAIT! :D **


	4. Christmas Plan and Evil Song

**Author's Notes: Last chapter definitely got some cheer :D **

**But now, the reference. Like I said, it was rather subtle. But here it is, Fifth Gen's lil' titbit: "Shining Beauty" as when describing the snow in Chapter 2. Sorry, Dark-Dullahan.**

**Shining Beauty is what Kamitsure is referred as in the Fifth Generation, and the only person to get that reference is an old friend of mine, known to the Fanfic World and to SSBB One-shots as Fox-pilot (Hopefully less disturbed then Fox himself). Well done, you :) Fox-pilot gets his free request, but the rest of you get this chapter! :D**

**Enjoy, as today, Bowser and Wario prepare for Santa's coming.**

The joyous atmosphere around the Mansion was as tangible as a brick wall; Joy and cheer ran through the air, as the younger Smasher's played and ran in the snow, whipping up flurries of solidified water as they threw snowballs, built snowmen and snow-forts and made snow-angels. Some had taken to ice-skating along the frozen lake, or fishing in the thick hole in the middle of it, where something appeared to have smashed its way out of a frozen prison.

The adult Smasher's were also in good moods. There was a therapeutic peace in hanging up the last of the bright decorations all around the Mansion, as Mario strung baubles and holly around the massive chandeliers of the Mansion, Lucario wrapping wreaths of holly around every doorknob as he whistled to himself and Zelda sprinkling tinges of snow on the tables and desks for a good Christmas look, while others admired the great Christmas tree, watching Jigglypuff puff up and place a star on top, as Samus snuggled in front of the fire, snoozing peacefully with a napping Pikachu in her arms. Peach, Marth and Fox had gone out shopping, and Meta Knight was polishing the Halberd with the help of R.O.B and Red.

There was a content and happy air within the home of the Brawl Tournament's competitors, and everyone was looking forward the joyous occasion of Christmas, the birth of Christ and a time of giving and happiness, and it was truly a wonderful holiday.

But two Smasher's had darker plans in mind for the holiday. Or rather, the being that represented it.

In the darkened confines of the basement, a large turtle-like creature stomped around the room, shoving boxes aside as his comrade, a fat man with a spiky moustache, biker clothes and a yellow hat with goggles lit the room with a single torch, also searching for the box that held their plans. But now, the former creature, known to this World as Bowser, spoke grumpily to the latter, Wario, his voice hissing with frustration and sparks of fire:

"Damn it all. Where is our box? We need it now if we are to prepare for Christmas."

"I know." Wario replied sulkily as he shoved a box marked: "_Property of Fox McCloud. Falco, if you touch this box, I'm gonna murder your face." _ Out of his way. "I'm looking, but I can't see it. Everything got mixed up when Pit dumped those crates on Lucario and Snake."

"Damn those guys. But rest assured, Wario; This year, we WILL have Santa Claus!" Bowser snarled as he shoved another box out of the way of his search

"Yes!" Wario replied enthusiastically, sneering cruelly as Bowser smiled maliciously: "This year, we'll catch that fat prick, and we'll show the World why he can't be trusted!"

"Yes..." Bowser sneered, as dark music suddenly filled the room, creepy and low, as the draconic beast began to sing:

_"To most people here, the time of Santa's coming is viewed with joy and glee. They believe him a kindly saint, fair and just. However, I'm afraid I must disagree."_

_"We know the truth, Bowser and I, about this conniving evil fat guy!" _Wario sang, leaping onto a crate and holding his torch like a microphone as Bowser nodded in agreement to the lyrics. _ "Everything said about this Claus is a lie! He's not good, he's as evil as lemon pie! We know the truth, and we'll expose him like we did to Ruth!"_

_"And the best way to net this creepy man-" _ Bowser sang, joining Wario on the crate as they slung their arms over each other's shoulders, and the biker added: _"-Who watches kids from his van!-" _And then the singing became simultaneous, the music becoming louder and more intense:

_"-Is to trap him in a box, setting fire to it like we did to Fox! To snare him in a trap, and forcing him to eat crap! On this Christmas Eve, our plans will come to pass, as we snag that evil demon like a snake in the grass!"_

Bowser leapt from the crate and shoved some more boxes out of his way, singing: _"Santa Claus is said to be the jolly old Nick, a kindly fellow who'd help an insect of stick. He gives us all presents and gifts, and to some special people, even free lifts."_

_"But he is not what they say he is!" _Wario added, as the music darkened deeply. _"He's the Devil in red and white, flying in a whizz! He enslaves poor little elves and deer, forcing them to work and slave as Christmas comes near! He never gives us what we really want, only to fly past us and make a rude taunt! Santa Claus is no good, and me and Bowser will boil him like wood!"_

_"We won't fall for his evil tricks-" _ Bowser sang, triumphantly finding the right box at last, which was labelled:  'Convenient Evil Plot Device. Property of Bowser and Wario' and pulling it into the open, before opening the lid and eagerly pulling out a deadly-sharp bear trap. _"-Not when we have our own traps to pick. From blades to wire, to burning him on a pyre, we'll catch that big red man, and we'll scrap him like a rusty old van!"_

Wario gleefully whipped out gas bombs and a rocket launcher from the box as he sang his part: _"This year, we'll wait and hide, and when his duty calls him to the Mansion inside, we'll ambush him, me and you, and we'll burn him up like a stupid old ewe!"_

_"We know the truth, Bowser/Wario and I!-" _ The duo sang maniacally as they continued pulling out weapons, traps and gummy bears from their evil box, the torch shining an ominous light on them, casting evil shadows as the unknown music got even more dark and intense: "_-About this conniving evil fat guy! Everything said about this Claus is a lie! He's not good, he's as evil as lemon pie! We know the truth, and we'll expose him like we did to Ruth!"_

_"And when he descends the chimney, sack in tow-" _Bowser hissed as they reached the bottom of their nefarious box.

_"-We'll be waiting, two hawks swooping low-" _Wario sneered, gazing at the final thing in their box with awe: _"And we have our weapons, like throwing him to a shark-"_

_"-And setting explosives on the roof, so his sleight can't park!-" _Bowser sneered.

And for the final line, both of them sang: _ "And for this Christmas, our **secret weapon**, a tool most cruel that loves to rend, will have at Santa Claus, and we'll destroy him at last, as he-_

_-Meets... His... **END! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"**_

And the sound of evil laughter rang throughout the basement, cruel and malicious, the evil plan of two Smasher's for Christmas' own jolly Saint Nick... Until Wario farted and the two had to quickly evacuate to the fresh air of the snowy outside.

**Author's Notes: Oh dear, this won't end well 0_0 I hope someone can stop their murderous plot.**

**I'm not too sure why these two hate Santa so much, but we'll find out soon. And don't ask about that Ruth person. She never existed... or did she?**

**Well, hope you liked this song I made up all by myself! :D**


	5. Lucario and Sonic: CHOCOLATE!

**Author's Notes: Enjoy Fox-Pilot's request today, as Lucario (and Sonic) embarks on an epic journey to find the Hanukah chocolate coins, but discovering something more sinister 0_0 Hopefully, not another Disturbia, like with poor Fox.**

**I wonder if Fox-Pilot ever had his own Disturbia? If he did, I think it might have been my fault XD**

**Enjoy!**

Ask anyone in the Mansion something about chocolate, and they, except for one being, would sigh, look around shiftily, and then they would tell you about a certain Smasher, whose love and hunger for chocolate was borderline possessive hysteria. This Smasher would literally fight himself or anyone else to the death over a single chocolate. He would physically abuse angels, beat up little kids with a door and even snap someone's spine simply to get the chocolate, wherever it was.

The Smasher? Lucario, the Aura Pokemon, a Steel/Fighting type creature of impressive stamina and strength, with powerful attacks due to his control of the Aura, brilliant senses of emotions due to his energy and an intelligent, tactical mind, not to mention great speed, potent defensive manoeuvres and the fact that he got stronger as he got weaker led to a powerful high-risk, high-return strategy.

Today, Lucario was on a mission of grave importance. Aiding him was another blue creature, a wily and carefree anthropomorphic hedgehog named Sonic... the Hedgehog. Sonic, as his name suggested, could run at super-sonic speed, and his agility and quickness was unmatched, even by the agile Pikachu or Captain Falcon. And he was helping his fellow Smasher today.

"Why do I have to do this crap? I have my own life, you know." The hedgehog grumbled, as he poked around the frozen bushes in the lush, snowbound garden, being sure to keep his blue scarf and hat out of the way of any cold branches that might snag them.

Lucario growled in frustration as his search of a nearby tree yielded nothing and he snapped at the speedster: _"Listen, Sonic, those Hanukah chocolates were a gift from my greatest friend: Meta Knight. And if I don't find them, I may explode out of anger! So, you WILL help me, or, Arceus damn it all, I'll tell Wolf and Fox who REALLY let the dogs out."_

The hedgehog paled, before recovering his cool bravado and wittily retorting: "You are such a preacher, Lucario. Go back to church and pray for bread and a fish. Besides, those chocolates were only the leftovers from MK's party last week."

_"That rude remark against religion will cost you dearly, Sonic."_ Lucario snarled at the hedgehog, leaping down from the tree to glare at the spiky runner and ignoring the leftovers part. _"However, I have no time to punish you. We must find my chocolates, so I may indulge myself in the glorious taste!"_

"And why exactly should I help you?" Sonic asked grumpily, glaring right back at the Pokemon. "Even if we find your chocolates, I won't get anything out of it. You wouldn't share your chocolates with a starving child, let alone me. Now, leave me out of whatever mess you'll most likely get us into, so I can go inside. There's this sexy Kamitsure x Fuuro Fanfic I want to read, and I really wanna read the part where they have se-"

"_Shut up, Sonic. You can indulge in Yuri later, but right now, my chocolates must be found!" _Lucario growled. _"I promise, if you help me find them, I'll reward you."_

This perked Sonic's interest now, and the hedgehog cautiously asked: "What kind of reward?"

_"I happen to know a secret recipe for an ancient species of Chilli Dog, and if you help me, I'll whip up a whole batch for you! These ancient Chilli Dogs have the power to burn rubber, literally, and they will satisfy every pore of your body with tasty hot nutrition!" _Lucario replied, throwing his arms up to emphasize the epic taste of this ancient recipes of the hedgehog's favourite food.

Sonic thought about it for a second, before sighing and replying: "Deal. I'll help you now."

_"Good. Now, we've searched the garden. You search the Mansion, I'll check the forest. We'll meet up here in an hour, and report any findings. Got it?"_

Sonic nodded, and with that, Lucario grinned and sped off, heading towards the icy forest nearby to search for his precious chocolates, which had disappeared from the Pokemon's room around half an hour ago. The hedgehog sighed, before speeding off into the Mansion to search, thinking one sentence:

_That guy really needs some kind of therapy..._

**The Forest**

Leaping agilely from bleak, frozen tree to bleak, frozen tree, like a ninja, Lucario sprang through the forest, faster then then a whizzing arrow, searching the icy cold forest for his precious chocolates. He loved those chocolates coins, how, upon unwrapping, a person was presented by a delicious meal of brown or white deliciousness, how they melted on your tongue like a soothing hot tub of taste. Truly a beautiful sensation, and Lucario wanted his glorious chocolates back...

Where had they gone, he wondered. They had been in his room, waiting for him to devour them, when they had vanished! Oh, he had been so pissed when he found his chocolates gone; He'd beaten up a singing Bowser and Wario, and then he'd had to journey to the Distortion Realm to try and rescue Giratina (He failed)

But now, he had to find his missing chocolates. They had been a gift from Meta Knight for him to consume, and damn if he didn't find them. If he couldn't find them, he'd go insane...

But, luck, and a need to get the chapter done soon, was on his side, and Lucario suddenly caught the faintest whiff of metallic wrapping, and the tiniest trace scent of... of...

CHOCOLATE!

Lucario jerked to a stop on on a tree branch as he took in the distinctive scents of his chocolate coins! He'd found them! Well, not yet at least, but now, he could track them down!

Growling in triumph, Lucario raised his head and howled into the grey sky, and, as predicted, something reacted to his long cry, and a blur of blue stopped by under him in a flurry of upset snow, revealing itself to be Sonic the Hedgehog, as Lucario leapt down from the tree, triumph in his voice as he quickly addressed the spiky fellow: _"Sonic! I have the greatest news! I have picked up the scent of my delicious chocolates!"_

"That's wonderful, Lucario." Sonic grumbled blandly. "Can we go find them now, so I can get back to that fic I was talking about earlier? It's just about to get steamy-"

_"Shut up and follow me!" _The Pokemon snapped, annoyed his comrade constantly getting distracted, taking a sniff of the cold air to pick up the scent of metal and CHOCOLATE. Finding it easily in the icy wind, he beckoned the grumbling hedgehog to follow him as he took off into the depths of the woods, where the light could not penetrate the bleak trees, snow whipping up around them as they ran forward in pursuit of the luscious scent of Lucario's missing Hanukah chocolate.

Their endeavour took them deeper in the woods, where they reached the foot of a small mountain, close to the mountain range, with a dark cave nestled nearby. Sensing the chocolate smell within the rocky confines of that ominous cave, Lucario moved forward, Sonic following cautiously behind him, muttering something about hating caves. Lucario rolled his eyes at the hedgehog, before motioning for the blue fellow to hold onto his tail while the Pokemon used his Aura to guide him through the pitch-black of the cave. Keeping close together, the duo journeyed into the ominous cave. Lucario's sensors were erect as he picked up the scenery around him through his use of the Aura, and sniffing out the growing-stronger scent of his missing chocolates.

At last, he would find his delicious chocolates...

But wait! There was light, torchlight, flickering and burning softly. Able to use their eyes now, the duo split and jogged down the rocky path to the light, eager to finish their quest, albeit for different reasons. However, they were in for a shock when they reached the final chamber of the cave, torches flickering all along the walls to create an eerie atmosphere of red light.

Within this cave was a pile of coins- The chocolate that Lucario as after. However, it was on a large metal platform hanging next to a nasty looking machine, whirring with lights and power, shining a bright silver in the light and clearly designed for some cruel and ominous purpose.

"The chocolate!" Sonic cried, pointing to the bag, and getting ready to whizz over and retrieve them-

WHAM!

Lucario was understandably shocked when a mallet swung out of nowhere and smashed Sonic's unlucky head right into the floor with a sickening crunch, before the weapon swung round and smacked Lucario into the sky, the Pokemon hitting the nearby wall hard. Sonic was quick to get back up, and he swing his fist at the attacker, but they merely rolled around him and kicked him to the floor.

Lucario had gotten back up, and gasped when he saw their attacker:

_"Kirby!" _Lucario snarled, as anger and frustration filled him: _"You and your DAMNED evil plots!"_

The puffball sneered at Lucario, brandishing his mallet and flipping the Fighting/Steel type his middle finger (If he had any) whom snarled in anger and flung himself into the air, spinning through the air and building up Aura power, before swinging his fists for Kirby. The puffball leapt out of the way as Lucario smashed the floor in a massive blast of Aura, snarling at the puffball, whom was suddenly bopped on the head by a spinning blue ball, which unfolded into Sonic, whom delivered a swift kicked to Kirby, knocking him back, as Lucario blasted the puffball with an Aura Sphere.

Kirby hit the ground hard, but got back as Sonic charged at him, swinging his legs up in an uppercut that hit the hedgehog into the air. That done, Kirby Inhaled a lunging Lucario, and spat the unlucky Pokemon out as a star projectile, which hit the falling Sonic, and both Smasher's exploded in a dazzle of sparks, the two hitting the floor hard, but getting back up to fight. They outnumbered that idiot puffball, two against one, and they were going to kick his ass for yet another stupid plot of his.

"So, Kirby, what stupid plot have you come up with this time?" Sonic snarled, as he and Lucario braced for the fight, as Kirby leapt on top of his machine, grinning evilly at the duo, before the marshmallow look-a-like said, in Poyo language:

_"Why, it's simple really. I'm going to use the chocolates that I stole from Lucario to create a super chocolate for my love, Jigglypuff, for Christmas!"_

When he didn't go on, Sonic coked an eyebrow and said: "That is the lamest evil pan ever. Good for Jigglypuff, and it's nice and all, but lame. You know, if you were half the idiot villain Doctor Eggman is-"

_"I'm TEN TIMES the idiot villain Doctor Eggman is!" _Kirby protested angrily, somehow ignoring the oh-so-obvious idiocy he just committed._ "Once my present for Jigglypuff is complete, this machine will turn into an evil satellite with lasers, tentacles and a Fanfic account, and it will take over the World, and I will rule all! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"_

_"Yeah, I don't care." _Lucario snarled angrily, epic power radiating from him as he brought his hands together to charge his epic power._ "NO-ONE MESSES WITH MY **CHOCOLATE! **TASTE MY AURA, F***ER!"_

And, with Sonic staring in shock, Lucario unleashed a monstrous Aura Storm, the blue beam ripping through the evil machine in a titanic explosion that sent the chocolate flying harmlessly into Sonic's arms, and an unconscious, thoroughly charred Kirby hit the ground in front of them, muttering: _"Oh, what a world, what a world..."_. Flames and bits of metal was all that was left of the machine after Lucario's attack, and that was that.

Simples.

Sonic gazed in awe at the carnage, ignoring Lucario grabbing the chocolate off him, the Pokemon petting and hugging his retrieved treasure tenderly, like a mother to her child, and the hedgehog regained himself to say: "Wow. Didn't see that coming. I thought we were going to have an epic, well-described and awesome battle with Kirby."

"Yeah, well, who cares. I have my chocolate at last!" Lucario cheered, hugging his precious candy tightly. "Now, go away. Me and my Hanukah chocolate need some alone time..."

Sonic picked up the unconscious Kirby, a torch to light his way, and he shook his head: "You really need therapy..." Before speeding off, leaving Lucario alone in the cave with his chocolate.

Some things were better left unseen.

But at least Lucario got the chocolate.

**Author's Notes: Lucario pwns all. Never mess with him. Unless you're a Fire, Ground or Fighting type :) He's an odd one nonetheless 0_0**

**Hope you lot liked it. If not, well, guess what? Kamitsure is hiding in your wardrobes, and she'll kill you. Simply by strangling you with your own appendix! So, unless you have Fuuro to distract her with, you'd better like this chapter. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**

**...**

**Seriously though, I hope you guys liked it. Merry Christ-Smash! :D**


	6. The Mall and Zelda's new Friend

**Author's Notes: Huzzah! Another chapter! :D **

**This time, the girls (Peach and Zelda) and Marth are out shopping! Will they get destroyed by the queues? Can they find the presents? Will they survive anything? Probably. **

**Remember, folks; Never underestimate a woman. If you do, you may find a high-heel lodged in your ass 0_0**

"I hate Christmas shopping, I hate the Christmas shoppers, and I hate Christmas lights!" Marth complained, as the swordsman wad forced to comb his hair yet again after another Christmas light caught on Falchion and electrocute the poor blunette (Blunette, a pun on blue hair and the brunette class :D)

Peach merely rolled her eyes at the grumbling pansy, while Zelda snapped: "Well, maybe if you kept that damn sword in its scabbard, where it belongs, then it wouldn't catch lights and electrocute you!"

"But I have to keep it out!" Marth whined, swinging his sword to ward off yet another fangirl. "Or these damn fangirls will freaking swarm me!"

The poor bloke had a point; The town of Smashville was rather crowded today. Decorated with trees and banners and glittered with snowfall, the humble town looked incredibly beautiful, a gleaming white utopia of shops, homes and other town stuff. Currently, the two women and the blunette were traversing across the snowy ground, glad in warm winter clothing, the girls in differing shades of pink and purple that suited them quite well, a good change from their normal dresses, while Marth merely had a more woolly variant of his usual outfit. His sword gleamed brightly in the lights all around as it defensively swung to keep a crowd of girls, all giggling maniacally, as they tried to literally grab a piece of Marth.

It was natural for a Smasher to have lots of fans, but some took it way too far sometimes, trying to grab even the tiniest hair from their victim. Thankfully, Zelda and Peach did not have that worry, and they were concentrating on which shop to visit, in order to finish the Christmas shopping. While the majority of the presents for Christmas at the Mansion had been bought, there were still a few more to get- Specifically, Link, Mario, Luigi and Sonic the Hedgehog. Marth had come along too, in order to buy some random stuff for himself (Shampoo) but now, he was under assault by fangirls.

As Marth ended up electrocuting himself again and fainted in a cloud of sparks, and the fangirls swarmed the poor guy, the princesses abandoned him to cruel fate and moved over to the nearby mall, the wonderful store lavishly decorated with all sorts of Christmas stuff, and a massive tree stood proud, tall and sparkly in the middle of the shopping arena.

Peach and Zelda gleefully squealed at all the awesome stuff to buy, before racing into the nearest shop- A Games Store! This store was where the Smasher's respective series posted their newest games. From Mario Galaxy 2 to Metroid: Other M, every Nintendo game after SSBB was sold here, and the Smasher's loved getting their newest stuff.

And the best part? There was a present for Sonic in the form of the new Sonic game: SONIC COLOURS! It was about Dr Eggman creating an amusement park, as to which Sonic and Tails set off to investigate any kind of misdeeds, and ended up on an epic and colourful adventure. It was the perfect gift for the hedgehog!

"Oh, Sonic's gonna love this!" Peach giggled as she picked up the game and made off to the queue. However, the queue was around twenty people long! The blonde gasped at such length (Bow chicka wow wow) before whining to an equally surprised Zelda: "Oh... this queue will take hours to get through!"

The brunette sighed and muttered: "No sh*t, Sherlock... But seriously. You buy the game, and I'll see what other stuff I can find. We'll meet by the tree in an hour."

Peach sighed as Zelda walked off, before grumbling: "All this waiting to buy Sonic a game. He had BETTER be doing something to thank me in return, instead of doing nothing like he usually does. Or he is going to HELL..."

**At the Mansion**

"HA! In your FACE, Shadow!" Sonic laughed, as he and his rip-off played War for Cybertron, and Sonic killed Shadow for the fourth time running. "You suck!"

"You're going to Hell, so bad..." Shadow snarled angrily, pouting in annoyance.

**With Zelda**

The second princess skipped her way through the lovely mall, in search of gifts for the Mario Bros and her boyfriend, Link. She knew exactly what to get for Link, so that was no worry, but getting a present for the Mario Bros would be tricky- Actually, no, it would not be tricky. Not at all. She knew exactly what to get those two.

And she found it, in a nearby toiletry shop, the most epic thing any plumber could ever imagine, and the best gift for the Mario Bros Zelda could give them, something so amazing, even the princess stared in awe at it-

_The Plunger Of Obliterating Plunges! (POOP) _

A magnificent plunger with a titanium handle decorated with anti-bacterial cleaners over the metallic length and a laser cannon at the end of it designed specifically for those tough stains on the loo. This plunger had a bowl-shaped cup at the plunging end, made of Super Rubber, the kind of rubber that makes the treads on Landmaster tanks and Meta Knight's toothbrush. This plunger was so powerful, it could unclog a toilet simply by looking at it; The bacteria killed themselves out of fear! Not to mention, it could snap a sword in half, take out a skyscraper, reflect nuclear missiles and it could even cure the common cold simply by beating the sufferer of the disease into a six-month coma, then they would wake up with superpowers.

Best of all, there were two of them in stock, one for Mario, and one for Luigi, and Zelda squealed with glee at the price (Both for $5) (Kinda makes you wonder why skyscraper-smacking toiletry tools are so cheap) and she raced over to get them. However, just before the happy girl could get them, a familiar hand grabbed her arm, revealing it to be a very angered Marth, whom promptly snapped at the surprised girl: "Listen, getting epic plumber stuff is fine, but why the F**K! Did you abandon me to those damn fangirls?"

"Because every now and then, a girl feels like being a bitch." Zelda sniffed, yanking her arm out of Marth's hand and grabbing the plungers, as the prince of Altea groaned and snapped:

"Listen, Zelda, if you were _half _the bitch that Samus can be-"

**"I'm ten times the bitch Samus can be!**" Zelda shrieked in defiance, and she slapped poor Marth around the face. However, in slapping him, her eyes then caught sight of another epic, under-priced thing on sale. Her eyes widened in amazement, before she grinned with glee and handed the plungers to Marth, demanding him to "Buy these, or I'll rip your balls apart." And with that, she sped off.

Marth watched her go, rubbing his cheek, before holding up two tennis balls close to him and he cooed: "Don't worry, Green and Yellow. She won't touch you..."

Zelda ran over to the thing she had seen, squealing with happiness. What was this thing, you ask?

None ever then the Solanor Ultra Tank 0107, the most powerful and deadly tank in all of this World. The thick platinum torso gleamed with strength, and its diamond covered treads were savagely sharp to tear up ground with its might, and the massive turret was longer then Fox's list of things that made his disturbed. The huge vehicle was so damned powerful, it could remove your virginity simply by existing. And Zelda was in love with the massive weapon of mass destruction.

"Hey!" She cried to the salesman standing next to it. "How much is this tank?"

The draconic salesman turned to her and replied: "Well, this is the Solanor Ultra Tank 0107, yes. It has a ruby-uranium power core that allows it to shoot lasers that could obliterate reality itself, oh yes. And it has Wifi connections as well, oh yes indeed!"

Zelda swooned with amazement, as the dragon went on, flaring the amber wings poking out of his suit: "It weighs 666 tonnes, has enough armour to survive a supernova, can smash through titanium bunkers and it CAN believe it's not butter, oh yes indeed. And it costs around a pound, yes."

"I'll buy it!" Zelda squealed happily, grabbing the tank's treads and dry-humping it, like a princess should not do in public.

"Excellent!" The draconic salesman cheered. "Allow to me to show you it's features, yes!"

With that, he pulled out a remote and pressed a blue button. A compartment on one side of the tank opened, and out came... WEAPONS! Another button was pressed, and from the other side, MORE WEAPONS! A third press, and from the front of the vehicle, STILL MORE WEAPONS! A final push, and from the back of the vehicle, yes, you guessed it: META KNIGHT'S TOOTHBRUSH!

Zelda fainted with ecstasy.

The salesman noticed this and sighed: "Well, she's bought it at least, so I can finally go back to thinking on how much I hate Samus Aran, yes."

**One hour later**

Meanwhile, Marth, clutching the recently bought plungers, as well as his own new shampoo, met up with a grumbling Peach sitting on a bench, whom thankfully had that video game she had bought, but she was still annoyed by all that waiting. Such was the curse of Christmas shopping.

"Hey, Peach." Marth greeted. "Seen Zelda anywhere? I got Mario and Luigi's presents."

"I saw Zelda having her fun with a tank." Peach replied, glancing up at the blunette. "And I have Sonic's present, and I think Zelda has Link's present, so we're all good."

"We can go home now?" Marth asked, and he whopped with joy when Peach nodded, before both leapt back in shock as a massive diamond-treaded platinum tank with a giant turret drove up next to them, rumbling with epic might, as Zelda popped her head out form the hatch, giggling maniacally, and she squealed: "Need a lift in my new tank? I named him Greg!"

Peach and Marth glanced at each other, before shrugging and hopping into the tank, which then drove off, crushing everything in its path, with a successful Christmas shopping trip behind it. However, as it drove off to the Mansion, Marth's uncertain voice echoed from the tank:

"Um, Zelda? Why are the seats all wet and sticky? And why is Olimar in here?"

**Author's Notes: To write such stuff as this, I must be freaking insane. Oh well, who cares? :)**

**So, Zelda got a tank, Marth got the epic POOP, Peach is annoyed and that salesman seems oddly familiar.**

**And for whose of you who are curious, Kamitsure did manage to catch Giratina. And he suffered. Be afraid. Be very afraid. Unless you're either Chuck Norris or Fuuro. Then you're safe.**

**Well, Christmas is tomorrow in jolly old England, so MERRY CHRIST-SMASH! **

**Soundwave 0107 wishes you the best :D**


	7. MERRY CHRISTSMASH!

**Author's Notes: It's a bit too late for Christmas, but here is the Christmas chapter for this fic! :D**

**Enjoy!**

"IT'S CHRISTMAS!"

The scream reverberated throughout the whole Mansion, the place having earlier been completely silent in the peace of early morning sleep. The sun was barely climbing over the snowbound mountains, glinting a bleary orange over the white horizon, spreading its glorious light across this World in a beautiful sight of snow and frozen trees, with icicles glinting off the worn branches. The mansion itself was layered with snow, icicles hanging from where they could hang and decorations all around.

And now, the shout had woken up the place.

Cheering wildly, again screaming: "IT'S CHRISTMAS!" Toon Link raced through the corridor and burst through one door, earning a yell of shock and a THUMP! As a startled Link fell out of the bed, and Zelda, having previously been lying next to him, groggily sat up, rubbing her eyes as she tired to regain sense, murmuring: "Where's the fire?..."

"Zelda!" Toon Link squealed, leaping onto the bed and cuddling into Zelda hugging her tightly as he squealed with glee: "It's Christmas! Merry Christmas, Zelda! C'mon, get up! We have to get everyone else and go downstairs for the presents!"

The princess seemed dazed at all this, hugging the little guy back, but she quickly perked up, eyes sparkling with new enthusiasm and she cheered, smiling widely: "Oh, wow! Merry Christmas, Toon Link! And you too, Link!"

"Blargh... My face hurts..."

With that said, the woman swung herself out of the bed, Toon Link jumping to the floor and exiting the room in a green blur of childish enthusiasm. Clutching her purple robes to herself so not to lose them, the princess moved over to the over side of the bed, picked up the muttering Link and easily dragged him after her as she made off to follow Toon Link.

Currently, the little swordsman had charged into Ganon and Bowser's room, and headed for the right bed, which held the King of Evil, and the little swordsman cried: "Ganondorf! Ganondorf! Wake up! IT'S CHRISTMAS! YAY!"

The warlock mumbled and shifted, but didn't wake up, as Bowser sleepily muttered: "Oh, five more minutes, Mama Peach..."

"C'mon, guys! Get up! It's Christmas! Time for fun and presents!" Toon Link cheered. Thankfully, this louder shout had worked, and both villains jerked awake in surprise, before sinking back into bed, grumbling angrily at the dim light in their dark room, Ganondorf muttering: "F**k off and die..."

"C'mon! Christmas!" Toon Link squealed, and this was the key. Bowser heard the words and woke up instantly as excitement flooded him, and the turtle leapt out of the bed, making the floor quake under his mass as he cheered: "Oh yeah! Christmas! Awesome! C'mon, Ganondorf!"

"No, I hate you." Ganon whined as Toon Link jumped on his bed, trying to get the warlock to wake up. Bowser rolled his eyes and promptly set the bed on fire.

Meanwhile, Ness and Lucas had woke up as well and were dancing with joy in the corridors, as Yoshi groggily exited his room, the dinosaur aching for a cup of coffee, which Ness thankfully provided by pulling one out of the nearby trashcan (Nobody knew how he could do that) which Yoshi happily accepted. With that, Ness, cheering happily, went to help Zelda guide the dazed Link downstairs, as Lucas went to Samus' room and knocked on it, squealing: "Wake up, Samus and Pikachu! Time for Christmas!"

Samus was a light sleeper, and she was at the door quickly, opening the door to reveal herself, her blonde hair flowing down her back, not in the usual ponytail, and clad in a light blue tank-top and trousers, cuddling a sleepy Pikachu to her chest as she tiredly, but happily replied: "Merry Christmas, Lucas. And you too, Lucario and Kirby."

The Aura Pokemon, giving a sleeping Kirby a piggyback, smiled and nodded in thanks at the woman, before moving off, Kirby snoring loudly as the excited duo of Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong passed by, chattering happily to each other on this most joyous of days. It went on from there; Happy, tired and excited Smasher's left their rooms, clad in pyjamas and sleeping clothes, chatting happily, wishing Merry Christmas, begging for coffee or tea or, in Ganon's case, begging for Mario to put out the fire that was burning his face.

However, there was a problem, as a piercing scream came from downstairs. This obviously woke everyone up, and everyone raced downstairs to the living room. The first ones to arrive- Sonic and Captain Falcon, gasped when they saw Zelda pointing at Link; The unlucky male had gotten caught in various traps, blades, wires and the secret weapon- That kitten from Hell that tortured Roy. Remember? From SSBB One-shots? Oh well.

Everyone gasped with shock at the horribly mangled body of Link when they saw what had happened, especially when the kitten jumped up and mauled Captain Falcon before Ganondorf ate it. Bowser and Wario looked sad (Their traps had failed, of course) and Zelda sighed sadly as she picked up the poor body of Link and gave him to R.O.B to take to Doctor Mario (And Falcon, too) before Mario declared: "Well, now that-a the punching bags of this-a fic have suffered ("Phew!" Snake breathed in relief) we can open-a presents! YAY!"

Everyone cheered, forgetting about the poor sufferers, and dove for the massive tree to get presents! It was a beautiful thing, to see everyone so happy and sharing joy and happiness with each other! These are the presents they got:

Mario and Luigi got those POOP's from last chapter, as well as lots of pasta and pizza! Peach got a golden frying pan, a new parasol and a pair of high heels made from glass! Bowser got horn polish and Extra-hot Chilli Bites! Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong got bananas! Yoshi got the corpses of several fangirls! Wario got bike fuel and garlic soup (He gave Olimar a big hug)

Link got sword polish, anti-fairy spray and a letter stating: _See you in bed, _from Zelda (Hope you fans are happy now) Toon Link got the same stuff, except the letter of course. Sadly. Ganondorf got the ability to use his sword in Brawl! Fox got sessions from the local therapist! Falco got a KFC! Wolf got-

You know what? These paragraphs are gonna get boring. Who cares what fictional characters get for Christmas? THEY DON'T EXIST! You're wasting this time here! Go fu- ARGH!

Peach: Continue story. **_NOW._**

Okay, okay.

Everyone was happily chatting within the great living room, the Christmas tree glowing brightly and proudly as some Smasher's tossed all the wrappings and stuff into numerous bins to keep the floor clear, as the children played happily with their new gifts, everyone commenting cheerfully on what they got, thanking the others for their gifts, and all of that fun Christmas cheer as they downed bottles of Cola, Dr Pepper and Fanta, eating their way through CHOCOLATES and sweets. Truly, it was a beautiful family scene...

"I think it's time to give everyone a good time!" Marth declared, standing proud and tall as everyone else looked at him: "And to do that, we will sing a Christmas song! Everyone ready?"

"YEAH!"

"And a one, and a two, and a one, two, three, four-"

And the Smasher's burst into song!:

_"Merry Christ-Smash, it's finally here!  
Merry Christ-Smash, it's finally here!  
So let's all have fun, lots of fun!  
And give out a great big cheer! YAY!_

_The time for snow and gifts is here!  
Filling this World with lots of cheer!  
To make lots of people smile  
And to just relax for a while! YAY!"_

_"I never thought I could truly enjoy the Christmas Time!" _R.O.B sang, holding his hands to his mechanical chest as he gazed reverently at the tree, and Ganondorf sang, swinging his Santa Hat around: "_Who would have thought there would be a day without my crime?"_

_"We've always hated Santa Claus, 'cause he always gives us coal!" _Bowser and Wario sang in a great duet. _"So we try to kill him, even by melting the North Pole! But our traps and hatred has failed, and we even forgot to rig that bomb we mailed..."_

_"But sometimes we just need to chill!" _ Wolf sang in a strangely high-pitched voice for some reason. _"Take a good old swig of the chill pill! Stop being a villain just for some cheer, and to just relax and drink up a beer!"_

And everyone started up again!:

_"Merry Christ-Smash, it's finally here!  
Merry Christ-Smash, it's finally here!  
So let's all have fun, lots of fun!  
And give out a great big cheer! YAY!_

_The time for snow and gifts is here!  
Filling this World with lots of cheer!  
To make lots of people smile  
And to just relax for a while! YAY!"_

Samus now rose for her own solo, and the joyful music turned to a more quiet, emotional tune: _"For so many years, I've lived to kill. Drowning aliens, and whacking them with a mill! Beating all the crap out of their bins, and then shoving it all back in!-_

_A dumb-ass dragon killed my parents with his fire, and so I roasted him on a pyre! I smash his face in, again and again, with a big pole, shoved it right up his damn spine! Even though I kill him, again again, he comes back to life, if only just to whine!-_

_But now, I'm happy, I get to see, the joy that is here, with all of ye! Time for peace and time to sing, no more murder and no more Bing! YAY!"_

Once more, everyone join in!:

_"Merry Christ-Smash, it's finally here!  
Merry Christ-Smash, it's finally here!  
So let's all have fun, lots of fun!  
And give out a great big cheer! YAY!_

_The time for snow and gifts is here!  
Filling this World with lots of cheer!  
To make lots of people smile  
And to just relax for a while! YAY!"_

And at last, Ness and Lucas for a duet!: _ "Please take note, this song is copyright of Soundwave 0-1-0-SEVEN! Ask to use it in a fic before you type, and boy, it sings like HEAVEN!_

And Doctor Mario!: _"If you-a use this song without-a permission, then you-a had be better listen: Kamitsure will-a hunt you down and set you-alight in a blaze! And you-a better not come to-a me, or I'll demand-a PAY RAISE!_

Everyone else joined in for the final verse:

_"Merry Christ-Smash, it's finally here!  
Merry Christ-Smash, it's finally here!  
So let's all have fun, lots of fun!  
And give out a great big cheer! YAY!_

_The time for snow and gifts is here!  
Filling this World with lots of cheer!  
To make lots of people smile  
And to just relax for a while! YAY!-_

_-And now that's done, we all sing!**  
A MERRY CHRIST-SMASH, for each and every thing!"**_

The song was finished and everyone cheered wildly at the awesome song they had just sung! Christmas was the greatest time of the year, definitely!

"Hey, Wario and Bowser!" Snake cried, rooting around under the tree. "Santa left you a present!"

"What is it?" Bowser asked, as Wario squealed: "Open it! Open it!"

Snake did open it, and out popped that bomb the duo had tried to send to Santa, which went _BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP!_ Everyone screamed: **_"WHAT THE F-"_**

Suddenly, Wolf grabbed the beeping bomb and tossed it out the window, where it exploded harmlessly. As everyone breathed in relief, Wolf triumphantly sneered: "Can't let you do that, WTF BOOM meme!"

"MERRY CHRIST-SMASH!"

**Author's Notes: HOORAY! Christmas has passed, I know, but here is the chapter for it! HOORAH!**

**Happy Christmas and Best Wishes and LOL Blessings for you, the viewers, and all your friends and family, cuz Soundwave 0107 loves you all! :D**

**However, I declare the Merry Christ-Smash as PROPERTY of Soundwave 0107. So, if you ever wish to use this song for something, ask first. Any matches to existing songs you may find are coincidence, since I made it up on the spot.**

**And remember, Kamitsure x Fuuro is win. Deal with it XP**

**Merry Christ-Smash, from Soundwave 0107!**


End file.
